I know now what it feels like to be done having babies.
I started having babies at 19 years old. I was still a kid but I got pregnant with number one and that is where it all started. I took on my responsibility with pride, knowing I wanted to be a better parent then I had.
After 4 years of just having one we were blessed with another one that didn't stay with us for very long. Never knew I was pregnant until it was to late to do anything to help it stay. Can't say I was connected to that one in anyway. (I know bad thing to say being a mom and all)
Another four years went by and we were blessed with another pregnancy.I was a bag of emotions when I found out and it just wasn't a good time in our life. But we pulled up our boot straps and knew that we were ready for this. Number 2 has been an emotional roller coaster, scary birth, always under weight up until this past year, seizures and some other issues. But he is pure joy, always smiling and full of energy.
In the middle of finding out what was going on with number 2 we were blessed with number 3. My mind went crazy with why now God, Why can't you pick your timing a little better then in the middle of our stress. But Hey whatever on with another pregnancy and another wonderful gift. Her arrival was wonderful, she came into this world with out a problem and has remained pretty healthy.
After having her I found out my doctors weren't willing to tie my tubes due to my weight. I was really heart broken by that but knew that I would get an IUD and it would give me 5 years to take all the weight off and I could get my tubes tied then. Or it would give us time to find out if we wanted more.
I sit here today knowing that I never want more, I never want to nurse another baby and I don't ever want to share my body with another human to grow inside of. I know that I am ready to see all the baby stuff leave my house and ready to not have to change another diaper. I also know that when I see other's newborns i don't have that same burning desire to go home and make a baby. It's just gone! Somewhere between giving birth to number three and today all of that has left me, and I am relieved and at Peace.
So today and forever 3 will be our Magic number...